The Revolution Will Be Right Back After a Message

yellahaze: Michael Jordan, Kid, Will Smith, DJ Jazzy Jeff &...

Tue, 18 Dec 2012 03:19:32 -0500

yellahaze:

Michael Jordan, Kid, Will Smith, DJ Jazzy Jeff & Play.

Tumblr is like an ongoing time capsule that records how fucking uncool you were once.

Wed, 18 Jul 2012 04:06:01 -0400

Tumblr is like an ongoing time capsule that records how fucking uncool you were once.

Photo

Fri, 04 May 2012 02:52:38 -0400

tylerkieslich: Recently I’ve been nostalgic for all those late...

Mon, 30 Apr 2012 00:45:29 -0400

tylerkieslich:

Recently I’ve been nostalgic for all those late 90s sitcoms that were set in New York.

Glory.

Thu, 19 Apr 2012 05:19:00 -0400

Sombrero Flocka hoists CapriSun.
Similar occurrences have been observed, except they haven’t.
“FLOCKA,” Flame said. “BRICKSQUAAAAA(unintelligible).”

Literally nothing don't waste your time reading it

Thu, 05 Apr 2012 06:52:00 -0400

I just picked up my Spark handbook and realized, yet again, why I love to write. It was a glorious moment in which I may have shed a single, hollow tear. Because you were wondering, this happened around 5:15 a.m. on an otherwise eventless night in sleepy Lincoln, Nebraska.

Additionally, I’ve now watched at least two (2) historically-grounded films on the subject of Iran, and thus consider myself an expert on all things Iranian politics. I know everything now, beginning, of course, with the events that transpired shortly before the 1953 coup that we totally initiated because we love democracy except when it’s inconvenient.

Like I was saying, I know everything. Don’t challenge me unless you enjoy experiencing abject humiliation.

Also, yes, Iran did have politics before the big scary bearded guy rode the plane there in 1979.

You can help yourself immediately by watching the movie “Persepolis.” Among other things, it is fascinating, and French and about Iran. It’s also art.

Do it, or be Rick Santorum.

fake-patois: Get at me dawg Tracks 1-16 are my favorite.

Sun, 01 Apr 2012 02:25:54 -0400

fake-patois:

Get at me dawg

Tracks 1-16 are my favorite.

Just decent though. Nothing more.

Fri, 30 Mar 2012 03:54:33 -0400

Just decent though. Nothing more.

Photographers are decent people.

Fri, 30 Mar 2012 03:49:56 -0400

Photographers are decent people.

Daily cliché #1 (there will probably never be another)

Wed, 14 Mar 2012 03:05:00 -0400

Today, I watched The Pursuit of Happyness (for probably the hundredth time). Now, I am inspired.

Changing my major to stock broker ASAP.

Prominent issues worth discussing.

Mon, 20 Feb 2012 07:01:00 -0500

Pictured: A metaphor.

My thoughts right now are a whirlpool of free association, so here’s a list.

1. Jeremy Lin isn’t the Übermensch. Let’s stop acting like he is. Pride is good, unflagging worship is not, and will almost certainly lead to disappointment. It’s like when everyone was freaking out over Boris Diaw, excepting that Boris Diaw didn’t have a vociferous pack of proud and ethnically similar minions (NO RACIAL) to further dickride at every move.

2. An ESPN reporter actually thought “Chink in the Armor” was an appropriate headline to describe circumstances surrounding said yellow. If nothing else, this proves once and for all that ESPN is an oppressive institution that exits only to induce laughter and perpetuate casual racism.

Don’t get me wrong, I love watching the same basketball highlights a hundred times a night as much as the next guy. It gets to the point where I can practically deliver each precisely inserted “BOO-YA” myself.

But the racism. I mean, they hired fucking Rush Limbaugh that one time.

And for the record, I do want badly for a black quarterback to succeed. It’d really make my day, honestly. Of course, quarterback is a sacred role reserved for the white man, so this makes me an iconoclast, I guess — one that thrives off the overplayed successes of famous black athletes.

Really though, why did anyone ever forgive them for hiring Rush Limbaugh?

Additionally, Skip Bayless’ existence as a prominent sports analyst on a widely-viewed sports network is a disgrace. Skip is the uncouth reality-TV whore of sports journalism. He’s the Real World cast member who gets drunk and knowingly calls the black guy the n-word for shock value, and then proceeds to brag about being famous.

3. Child abuse is bad.

4. I want money, cars, clothes and hoes. Metaphorically.

5. Drake is probably an asshole. Chris Brown is definitely an asshole. I wanted really badly to forgive him for battering that chick (ALICIA KEYS, I THINK) that one time, but I just saw his GMA interview with that black, and just damn, what a dick. Seriously, he must be really ignorant.

6. I very easily warm up to nihilists. The same cannot be said about the white girls at college.

7. Lots of violence is happening in Syria, and nobody important seems to give a fuck. It also happens that Syria is currently facing declining rates of oil production. I’m not saying…wait, wait, I am.

8. The media is actively flouting journalistic responsibility by choosing not to cover the Khader Adnan hunger strike. That’s bothersome.

9. I recently received an OBAMA 2012 bumper stick in the mail and didn’t know what to do with it, which kind of encapsulates my feelings on the issue as a whole. On one hand, a lot of social progress had been made. On the other, lots of war crimes have been committed. I like the president very much, and I’ll probably be voting for him, but I’m definitely not impassioned and naive like I was in 2008.

So I’ll vote for him, but I won’t be super excited about it. I’ll still be way more satisfied than Republicans who are voting for Mitt Romney, though. Mitt Romney, ha.

Pictured: “We just have so much money, guyz. What should we do with it? Eat it? Throw it at people? Eat it?”

10. Parts of this post were loaded with casual racism because it was actually written by Skip Bayless. Additionally, fuck this blog. It sucks. What’s a Faiz anyway?

Must be a brown.

- SB

I think I learned how to write by listening to rap music. You don’t have to believe me.

Thu, 09 Feb 2012 06:35:11 -0500

I think I learned how to write by listening to rap music. You don’t have to believe me.

timelightbox: Feb. 6, 2012. A Syrian man hugs his seriously...

Thu, 09 Feb 2012 02:59:13 -0500

timelightbox:

Feb. 6, 2012. A Syrian man hugs his seriously wounded brother in a house used as a hospital in Bab Amr, a southern neighborhood of Homs.

Syria is no longer sliding into war or staring at the abyss of warfare. Syria is at war. On assignment for TIME this week, photographer Alessio Romenzi risked his life documenting civilian casualties in Bab Amr, a district in the besieged city of Homs.

See more here.

The whole world needs to know about this.

nevver: Snow Elephants of Canada This is fantastic.

Tue, 31 Jan 2012 06:34:08 -0500

nevver:

Snow Elephants of Canada

This is fantastic.

Writing for a newspaper...

Mon, 30 Jan 2012 05:45:00 -0500

…is different.

Honestly, I thought I’d be drowning in ennui by now. Not because I don’t like actual journalism, but rather, because I once thought objective reporting to be dead and/or an oppressive institution that only bred empty, cliché-laden volumes of nothing. Mostly, it is. But that doesn’t make my presumption any more valid (for the sake of this post, at least).

Basically, I thought objective reporting was the black hole that sucked up all of the nuanced writing in the universe. I was wrong. It’s harder to do — or do well — and I like the challenge.

But I still like being an irreverent, opinionated fuck a lot better.

DEEP.

Sat, 28 Jan 2012 04:36:32 -0500

Newt Gingrich referred to spanish as “the language of the ghetto” once. That is all.

enunciating is hard sometimes.

Sun, 22 Jan 2012 17:33:00 -0500

enunciating is hard sometimes.

talldarkarab: imstillbelowtheheavens: Fidel: Wanna Hear a Joke...

Sun, 08 Jan 2012 17:36:01 -0500

talldarkarab:

imstillbelowtheheavens:

Fidel: Wanna Hear a Joke Malcolm?

X: What?

Fidel: America.

Both:HAHAHAHA.

I LOVE THIS! :)

When I reblog things, it means they’re special.

Why Iowans Should Exist Today and Today Only

Tue, 03 Jan 2012 16:26:50 -0500

As the cosmopolitan sore thumb of middle America, I usually take it upon myself to harangue Iowans and other cultural inferiors for existing. After all, no state says “I’m not racist, I have a friend who’s black” quite like Iowa does. (Note: Might not be racist, but he hasn’t seen his black friend in years.) I’m talking the whitest hues (or Hughes) of all humanity here. People who top their mayonnaise with mayonnaise and then wash the heinous culinary atrocity down with a Sierra Mist, diet if it’s available.

But as much as we’d like to deny it, the godforsaken crop-laden plains of Iowa do offer something that we, the city-slicking cultural superiors, simply don’t. A sacred institution that the establishment is quick to label “outdated” and “a waste of time,” mostly, though, because it’s archaic and inefficient. A grand showcase of democracy that strives to promote American principles, without the added worry of m-1000-equipped teenagers and blown off appendages. Once in a presidential election cycle, those wretched Hawkeye wastelands transform into into a Seth Macfarlane fantasyland where “democracy kicks in” and runs its course, all because of one longstanding Iowan tradition.

It’s (unofficially) called LARP democracy and yes, in execution, it is as inexplicably badass as it sounds. That’s right, voting, badass. The Iowa Presidential Caucuses, along with other states’ similar electoral methods, add some necessary flair to a task as onerous, as gray and dull and monotonous as participating in the democratic process. Picture traditional voting, only with informed citizens, fervent support even of “unelectable” candidates, healthy discussion and…order? At the same time?

You see, democracy doesn’t have to be a bastion for vitriol and misinformation, for ballot stuffing and, in one notoriously corrupt city’s case, postmortem political allegiance. Sometimes people just want to innocently cast a vote in support of the candidate most suited to address their specific needs. The thing is, some voters, despite their determination to participate in the democratic process, are understandably ambivalent — unwilling to sing one flawed candidate’s chorus in favor of another, even on election day. After all, a candidate field that boasts a serial cheater, a Stepford husband, an alleged racist, two actual homophobes (both named Rick), and Michele Bachmann doesn’t exactly present anyone (sane) with an easy decision. Even the number nine has been uneasy about casting a vote ever since the derailment of that serial-groping Cain Train.

But for those who find themselves insecure about these feckless, all-too-mortal nominees, the caucuses provide some much-appreciated help, more at least, than a rigged Diebold machine could ever hope to.

The process is simple. Somewhere around 800 caucus locations host all of Iowa’s Republican voting population, which meets in gymnasiums, church basements and high schools across the state. Scores of caucus-goers, instead of occupying ominous voting booths, flock to their candidates’ respective representatives, which is the main difference between caucuses and primaries. Basically, people who are putting forth a last-ditch effort to persuade the undecided caucus-goers, coerce them with words, threaten them, whatever, into supporting their candidate. As one HuffPo article puts it: “The same typically isn’t true for primaries.” With polls showing 41 percent of Iowans still undecided on a candidate, this quasi political forum period is, as only Tiger Woods would put it, HUGE. This is LARP Democracy running its course.

Finally, after much intense persuading, each precinct selects a candidate to represent it on a county level, a process that only takes place after representatives first attempt to talk undecided voters into choosing their candidates. Needless to say, the intense period of discussion that precedes the actual voting could swing the results even to favor a candidate as disingenuous and uncharismatic as Rick Santorum. If nothing else, Santorum’s surging poll numbers are a testament to the healthy volatility of the Iowa Caucuses, where an informed voting population doesn’t settle for the candidate who sits atop the polls, or atop the ballot, or the one whose name is the easiest to pronounce. The Iowans truly set out to select the candidate who is best-suited to serve the country. Instead of throwing their pre-determined support towards a name on a screen, they’re “doing it live” (fuck it), and participating in democracy the way they should be, as informed, opinionated and impassioned citizens.

And so today, the self-proclaimed cosmopolitan, city-slicking cultural superiors like me have no business in haranguing Iowans for existing. Today, the provincial Iowans are LARPing democracy in a way that we all should, because it’s healthy to a free society and, suffice to say, kind of cool. The caucus system, after all, enabled a state that “hasn’t seen its black friend in years” to play a pivotal role in electing the nation’s first black president. Circumstances are obviously different with today’s GOP Caucuses, but the system is nonetheless a stronghold in modern democracy. In a world of “the system is broken-s” and “fuck the system,” the caucuses are the last genuine systematic procedure we have to hold onto.

That is, unless the Iowans use their voting power to select Rick Santorum as their candidate. In such a case, “fuck the system” will be the only acceptable retort.

We look like a noted crime family. Also, I’m...

Mon, 02 Jan 2012 23:09:00 -0500

We look like a noted crime family.

Also, I’m quote-unquote back on my grind. Gonna post something important on here later tonight.